When Things Couldn't Get Worse....
by Chibi-Ryoko
Summary: When things couldn't get worse for Earth's Special Forces, teletubbies, armed with atom bombs made with honey beer intend and destroying Earth, and replacing it with La La Land. It is my first humor, so don't flame me, and if you do, beware. Please R&R ^
1. The beginning of havoc

Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ, I'm broke, so don't sue me! I already have enough prob- *hears pounding at the door* Oh, and thank God I don't own Teletubbies! *door breaks down as people in white coats come and drag me off* HELP!!!  
  
Author's Note: This is for the insane, so um... if you're a sane person um... don't read! Yeah, don't read!  
  
It was a normal day in the city of Townsville- ah hell, what am I saying. K, let's try this...  
  
It was the city of amnesia- what the fuck? That ain't right either! Let's see, maybe if I get past this stampede of fruitcakes bent on world destruction and...  
  
The Satan City police were dealing with yet more hippies on a suicide mission, trying to get something from Hy Vee. Little did they know that behing the Drugstore on 666th Avenue, evil plots were a foot.  
  
A teletubbie in a pink dress walked up to another one carrying a purse. "Lord Queerball," the teletubbie in the dress said, saluting the other teletubbie. "We have finally beat the Pokemon fans in Twister. Phase 2 is now comeplete."  
  
"Excellent, Fluffy," The teletubbie with the purse said in an ominous voice. "Now all we have to do is compromise is Zirconia, and then we can take over Satan City."  
  
"But Lord Queerball," Fluffy said. "What about the Earth's Special Forces? They have the power to send into the next dimension."  
  
Lord Queerball smiled queerly as he pulled out some charts and posters, showing them to her/him/it. "You see," he explained, showing the other teletubbie some charts of porno, furbies, Spice Girls, etc. "All we have to do is use the Earth's Special Forces' weaknesses to our advantage."  
  
Fluffy looked confused at Lord Queerball. "But sir, there is no known weakness of Vegeta, sir." Lord Queerball then smiled as he showed her baby and fusion pictures of Vegeta, making Fluffy fall over, laughing her/his/its head off, remembering that they had smuggled the pictures off of something called the internet.  
  
At Capsule Corps, Vegeta was training in the little training thingee when the annyoing face of Mrs. Briefs appeared on thie really large screen. "Happy Easter, Vegeta!" She chirped, waving at him. Vegeta tried ignoring her, but after repeating herself for 3 hours, 53 minutes, 33 seconds, and 12 milliseconds, he shouted some nasty saiya-jin cuss words at her, making only say something else extremely stupid. He muttered as he finally left the training thingee, making plans on sending her to the next dimension. I mean come on! She flirts with her own son-in-law!  
  
Trunks was outside, playing with Goten when Vegeta walked past them, muttering more saiya-jin cuss words, as her slammed open a door, and walked inside Capsule Corps. When he was gone, Trunks and Goten grabbed some Playgirl magazines from under a mound of sand in a sand box, and started looking at the pictures, being a little gay themselves.  
  
Vegeta stormed into the kitchen, and started getting food from the fridge when a really young Bra walks in, carrying a teddy bear behind her. "Daddy?" She asked. "Why is the sky blue?"  
  
Vegeta looked at her, and stopped cussing. "I don't know," he admitted.  
  
"Why?" She asked.  
  
"Becuase I was never told."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Just because."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Dammit, just go send your brother and Kakkarot's brat into the next dimension!"  
  
"Okay! Love you, bye bye!" With that, Bra walked outside, and some shouts and ki blasts were heard.  
  
Vegeta shook his head as he looked back into the fridge, and pulled out a turkey roast, and- wait, you mean Bra can actually shoot ki blasts? Oh wait, nevermind. Vegeta then ate the roast within seconds, and wnet back to the training thingee.  
  
Outside of Capsule Corps, two little teletubbies in tight green suits and pink boots were mixing up some honey and beer, and putting it in a bomb case. "Yes!" They shouted, "we've finally made the atom bomb! Now we can destroy this planet and replace with La La Land, and haunt little minds with our ingenious programs!" They then opened up a garage door, and were about to put the bomb in there, but they caught Ginyu the frog making out with another frog. The teletubbies paused for a second, then slammed the door shut, their eyes wide. "Holy crap, I didn't know frogs could do that!" With that, they decided to search elsewhere to put the bomb.  
  
Meanwhile, somwwhere on Mt. Paoz, loud shouts were heard from a house that looks like something Dr. Frankenstein made. Then thuds of metal were heard against thick saiya-jin skulls as even more shouts were heard. It was obvious that Chi-Chi was the voice shouting, and was suffering from PMS or something. Then she'd start crying and all that shit until her husband, Goku, would make yet another extremely stupid comment that would make her start bitching again, leaving me, the author, another migraine.  
  
Outside of the loud house were three more teletubbies in tight green suits and pink boots, and thay had yet another one of their atom bombs full of honey beer. "Be quiet," the teletubbie said to the others who had started to make out. "We have a mission to do you cocksuckers!" The opther teletubbies then stopped what they had started, and set the bomb next to the house, then began to sneak away, but didn't get too far until Chi-Chi stood in front of them, a glare fixed on her face.  
  
"AND WHO ARE YOU!?!?" She demanded, smacking one of the teletubbies on the head, and cracking his/her/its head in half, making him/her/it die instantly. The other teletubbies took step back, before they started running. Chi-Chi gave a half-hearted chase before they fell down, and started gasping for air, and died. Chi-Chi smirked at her triumph for a second, then went back to glaring as she stormed back into the house, and began bitching at Goku once again.  
  
"Lord Queerball," Flffy said, in some sort of tight, leather undies thing with a whip at her side. "It seems that Sir Humpalot, Sir Jackalot, and Lady Shagmepleez have been killed during Phase 3, sir," She said, saluting the teletubbie infamously known as Lord Queerball, who just happened to be looking out a window and at the gay bar across the street.  
  
"I have heard," He replied in a disturbingly gay voice. "Which is a pity. I enjoyed having threesomes with Sir Humpalot, and Sir Jackalot."  
  
"I understand," Fluffy said, adding a seductive tone to her voice, which bothers me that Fluffy is a teletubbie in a leather outfit. "But you can always call me.  
  
Okay, that was getting too weird, so let's take a look at what's happening at Capsule Corps. In Bulma's room, there's a lot of noise if you stand by the door, sorry to all you perverts out there, I'm not going to describe it. In Bra's bedroom, Mrs. Briefs is telling Bra a bedtime story, which is a bad thing for little Bra. Finally, in the living room, those two gay kids, Trunks and Goten, are surrounded by Playgirl, porno, and slash doujinshi. Right now, they're playing Conker's Bad Fur Day on Nintenod 64, which I have to admit, is somewhat a cool game.  
  
Trunks looks at Goten and smiles, strange things floating in his demented mind. Goten looks back at him, and smiles back. Before you know it, they're on top of each other, and let's find move on, and find something not perverted.  
  
Mrs. Briefs finshes reading Cinderella, and looks at Bra, who is curled up in a little ball in a corner, shivering like she's out in a foot of snow. Mrs. Briefs smiles, gets up, says "Goodnight Bra," and leaves the room, turning off the light, leaving Bra with nightmares about fairy Godmothers, and glass slippers.  
  
Please Reply! ^_^ 


	2. Say hello to Queers Anonymous

Chapter Duex!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ or Teletubbies. Sue me, and I'll come after you with a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken!!! *thunder strikes* Buahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh, I don't own South Park either.  
  
Author's Note: The plot is still in the smog, just like those big-ass cities. However, it will be revealed when I feel like it. So deal with it until then!!! ^_^  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Just a few more spaces...  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Almost there...  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Just a little bit farther...  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
You mean you actually came this far down to read!? Fine!!! *waves hands* Presto Chango!!!!!!!  
  
  
Vegeta was in a bad mood. He is an extremely bad mood. While he was getting um... lucky with Bulma... ugh... you see.... The Teletubbies sort of blew up that gravity machine thingee with their honey beer bomb. So.... yeah.... Mrs. Briefs tried cheering him up by offering him some tea, but seriously, when was the last time Vegeta drank tea? Oh well, She wasn't successful since he had to take his anger out on the nearby kindergarten so.... Heh heh....  
  
Bulma walked downstairs to the living room, and gasped at what she saw. Playgirl, Yaoi/Yuri stories, and slash doujinshi were scattered all over the floor. Conker's Bad Fur Day was still on the TV screen, but the most disturbing thing was that Goten and Trunks were sleeping under a blanket -_^. She screamed like an evil leopard from the planet Cha-Cha was attacking her. This got Vegeta's attention, and made him forget about the damn gravity machine thingee, and come rushing to see if some new villain had appeared (No, not to rescue Bulma!!!).  
  
When Vegeta came flying into the living room to see what Bulma was screaming about, he immediately turned his head away. "HOLY SHIT!!!!" Vegeta shouted, waking Trunks and Goten up. The two lovers (not B/V!!!!) turned bright red in humiliation (and so would you!!!). The thing bothering Vegeta wasn't that Goten and Trunks were sleeping together, by the video game froze into the screen. Now he wouldn't be able to watch the car crashes. He shouted some saiya-jin cuss words about the TV, and Bulma was bitching about trying to keep her son from being queer (a little late for that!!!!). So basically, all hell broke loose in Capsule Corps.  
  
Downtown at Satan City, a few insane reporters (including me!!!) were trying to get the coverage about the Honey Beer Bombing that took place in Orange Star High School. Then when the Great Saiya-man came around, everyone came rushing to him, asking all these damn useless questions.  
  
"Didja catch the suspect?"  
  
"How the hell can honey beer make a bomb?"  
  
"Where can I get a tunic like that?"  
  
"Can I take a picture for the newspaper?"  
  
"I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
"ZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZz....." It appeared I had fallen asleep on the job once again. It didn't matter though. I was supposed to do a report on the Teletubbies on 666th Avenue. Meanwhile, I had lovely dreams about Vegeta ^_^.  
  
While I was napping, Bulma was dragging Trunks to this one scary building that said "Queers Anonymous" in big black letters above the double doors. Chi-Chi was right behind Bulma, dragging Goten with her. Just as they entered the door, a kid in an orange sweatshirt was stabbed and mugged by the prostitutes on Wall St. "Oh my God!!!" A fat kid shouted. "They killed Kenny!!!"  
  
Another kid then pointed at the prostitutes. "You bastards--- ugh... bitches!!!" While they shouted at the Wall St. prostitutes, Teletubbies in green suits and underpants gnomes ran past them and into "Queers Anonymous." Once inside the building, the underpants gnomes began singing, and started secretly robbing every one of their undies. Meanwhile, the teletubbies made like the Matrix with their beefsteaks, and pounded their way to the incurable center to place more honey beer bombs.  
  
"But Mom!!!" Goten whined. "I don't need to be here, I'm okay, really."  
  
"Same here," Trunks added, his hand going numb thanks to Bulma's evil grip. No matter what though, they were stuck going to the Queers Anonymous, no matter what. Thanks to their damn moms, and their bitching about homosexuality and all kinds of other shit.  
  
The Great Saiya-man flew over Satan City, with that bitch named Videl looking all over for him. However, since the Great Saiya-man was smarter than her, she wasn't all too successful. While Videl was looking for the Great Saiya-man, I was concerned with who stole my panties when I woke up.  
  
Trunks and Goten were alone in a room with other queers, and a variety of doctors who looked queer themselves. "Hi!" a dark-skinned guy with silver hair said in a high voice, batting his eyelashes at Trunks. Goten was about to burst out laughing until he got a glare from the purple-haired kid. After a few more flirtations, the session began.  
  
"Hi there," a man in green said, wearing a pin that said "Mr. Garrison" on it. He held up his puppet, and began introducing it to everybody. "This is Mr. Hand, and he will be helping me teach you that it is wrong to sleep with the same sex as yourself." He then grabbed a bunch of Playboys, and handed them out to all of the boys. The guys screamed, throwing the magazines across the frickin' room, covering their eyes. Mr. Garrison sighed. "Mr. Hand? I should've never left South Park Elementary to be a counselor for gay people."  



End file.
